Shifting Mindset Starts and Ends with Mindfulness
"If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change your attitude.” —Maya Angelou
I had a recent conversation with a colleague about the connection between mindfulness and mindset. For me, it feels like a no-brainer that the two have a symbiotic relationship, but for this colleague it wasn’t as obvious. So let’s take a closer look…
If you’ve been following Inseus for a while, this won’t be new to you, but as a refresher, my favorite definition of mindfulness comes from Jon Kabat Zinn—the founder of Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction (MBSR)—and it goes like this: “mindfulness is awareness that arises through paying attention, on purpose, in the present moment, without judgment.”
On the other hand, mindsets, as defined by the SIY Leadership Institute, are our “deeply ingrained assumptions and beliefs that influence the way we understand the world and how we take action in it.” For example, someone might hold the mindset that financial success is necessary to be happy, or that people of a certain political ideology are dangerous, or that you can know something about someone based on their appearance.
You can think of mindsets like invisible lenses through which we are viewing and filtering our everyday experiences. And while some mindsets can be positive and helpful, others may be limiting and create stress, disconnection, or reactivity in our lives.
Often, in order to access the awareness that arises with mindfulness, we are required to pause—in a way that is open, nonjudgmental, and curious. From this place, we can see our own autopilot tendencies, knee jerk responses, and conditional bias more clearly. And, we may be able to embrace what response would best serve the situation, us, or others. Without mindful awareness, we are unable to see clearly, expand perspective, shift mindset, and access a new way of being.
So now that we understand what mindset is, how can we shift it?
The first step in shifting mindset is to simply notice: “Where is my attention right now?” “How much attention am I giving this thought?” Pay attention to your energy. Your energy can either suck the oxygen out of a room or it can breathe life into it. Ask yourself, “How and who do I want to be right now?” Name it. Take a few deep inhales and exhales to calm the nervous system. See if you can embody who you want to be in this moment. These are simple, foundational mindfulness practices.
Once you’ve built awareness around your attention and soothed the nervous system, you can then begin the work of shifting your mindset through practices like cognitive reframing, self-compassion, and gratitude.
Cognitive Reframing
As one of my favorite teachers, Byron Katie, says: “A thought is harmless unless we believe it.” Often when a situation feels stressful, challenging, or out of our control, it triggers an immediate response. Our instinct may be to try to fix or control the situation. Or we may attach to a rigid way of thinking about the situation. What if, instead, we created space for curiosity? What if we explored our negative thoughts, using a few questions:
What is the thought I am believing right now?
Can I be absolutely sure that this thought is true? Really?
What happens when I believe this thought? How do I feel and act? How do I treat myself and others? Who do I become when I believe this thought?
What if I didn’t believe this thought? Who would I be without this thought?
If learning from this situation was my primary intention I would...
Creating the space to investigate negative thoughts, rather than simply attaching to them, is a tremendous way to expand perspective, dial up awareness, and shift mindset.
Self-Compassion
Scientific research shows that accessing self-compassion also supports shifting mindset. Struggle, loss, and uncertainty are all part of the human experience. But quite often difficult situations are made even more difficult because we resist or do not accept what is. We then create additional stress or even trauma by unleashing judgment, criticism, and self-blame. To tame the inner critic and shift to a place of compassion, you can practice the three steps of mindful self-compassion:
Step 1: Mindfulness. Name what is. “This is a moment of suffering.” “I’m struggling right now.” “This moment is hard.”
Step 2: Common Humanity. Focus on connection. “Pain is a part of life.” “Other people have experienced this feeling before.” “I am not alone.”
Step 3: Extend Kindness. Soothe the nervous system. “In this moment, I choose to give myself grace.” “Breathing in, I do my best. Breathing out, I let go of the rest.” “I am enough.” “It’s going to be okay.”
By practicing self-compassion, we can bring the wise, open-minded, thinking brain back online. Physiologically, self-compassion helps to decrease stress in the body and connects us more readily with executive functions, discernment, and intention.
Gratitude
Gratitude is a transformational practice. It naturally connects us to a place of contentment, positivity, awe, and resilience, and allows us to experience life more fully. Rather than focusing on what we don’t have or a scarcity mindset—which activates the stress reactivity cycle—we can focus on what we do have and an abundance mindset—allowing us to change our relationship with stress and unlock a new way of experiencing the world. This puts us in the right frame of mind to see, appreciate, and explore the possibilities. Try this simple, remarkably effective gratitude practice:
At the end of each day, spend a few moments journaling about three things that went well that day, why they went well, and how they make you feel. For example, “I had a delicious dinner. Why? Because I carved out the time to cook. I felt nourished and healthy.” or “I had a productive day because I got a good night’s sleep last night. I feel energized and good about myself.” Focusing on the why and how it makes us feel is important as it reminds us of the specific role that each of us plays accessing the ‘good’ in our lives.
From my experience, there is no such thing as a mindset shift without mindfulness. It all starts with awareness, specifically the shift from autopilot to awareness. So, remember that your Ground Zero for shifting mindset is nothing other than a few practical, accessible, evidence-based mindfulness practices. Try a few of these, particularly when you’re struggling with negativity, limiting beliefs, or black & white thinking. I’d love to hear what supports you!
Mindfully yours,
Ashley